Just like that, I'm curled up in the floor...
Hands grabbing at two bobby pins, missing, falling, and missing again, eventually with one in each hand I move my fingers quickly, tangling and un-tangling the two pieces of wire.
When I stop, my hand convulses, vibrates even, sending shivers of pain and pressure through my veins. And you know what really gets me? The anger. The there-is-no-way-this-is me anger that wriggles and ties my insides in knots.
I don't set it free, not this time, but it takes everything I've got to keep it under control. I want to scream and smash things. I want to be angry with myself as hurtful words bounce back and forth in my head. But I don't. I just sit here, hands and forearms now wrapped tightly around my chest, focusing on everything and nothing at all.Read More